• Friends,  Mental health,  Ruminations

    I will always believe in you even when no one else will, not even you

    He spots me smoking alone and staring off into space. Lost in my Spotify playlist, I don’t notice him approach until he taps me on the shoulder and asks, “Are you okay?”

    He didn’t need to wait for an answer. I couldn’t speak, anyway. I just collapsed into his embrace.


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  • Relationships

    ’til next weekend

    stack of love wooden blocks
    Photo by Ylanite Koppens on Pexels.com

    “Get up. Let’s dance,” you said.

    As I molded my body to yours, we swayed back and forth, even with no music in the background. Just our conversation and soft laughter. I press myself against your chest and listen closely to your heartbeat.

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  • Tech

    Plot twist of the year: I made the switch from iOS to Android!

    As a hardcore Apple fangirl for the past decade, I myself cannot believe this has happened. My boyfriend told me several times about the advantages of Android but I never really listened.

    android, tech

    The past three months, though, I began seriously thinking about switching. After all, Apple’s products are notoriously expensive. And if I can get a better product for a lesser price, well, what’s stopping me?
    I must admit that my owning an iPhone made me proud, as it was deemed a status symbol in this consumerist world. But I don’t want to pay for an overpriced gadget anymore. Keeping up with its new releases is simply unsustainable, and impractical.

    So, I did a bit of research and settled on buying the Huawei P20 Pro.

    It has three Leica brand lenses which make for highly detailed and sharp photos. I love how clear the pictures turn out, and how there are so many photography features in the native camera app (aperture, long exposure night mode, portrait, etc.).

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  • Mental health

    Shaming me for taking meds? Let’s talk.

    Depression is a difficult illness to explain, mostly because even experts are not yet sure as to what causes it.

    Whatever the cause may be, there’s a stigma surrounding mental illness and even more of a stigma when it comes to admitting that you take antidepressants, anti-psychotics, and anti-anxiety meds to help you.

    antibiotic blur cocktail glass cocktail tablets meds
    Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

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  • Prose and poetry,  Relationships


    clouds cloudy dawn dramatic
    Photo by Ghost Presenter on Pexels.com

    I don’t like it when you’re away.

    And I don’t just mean

    when you’re far from the reach

    of my arms.

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  • Writing

    On blog stats

    Recently, I watched Stephanie Nicole’s video where she says she feels discouraged if her viewer engagements go down. I totally get it because I myself am a content creator, and when I don’t see responses to my posts, I stress out, too.


    I love blogging, don’t get me wrong. I’m not purely in this for fame or money. Still, engagement is something that’s meaningful to me because it makes me feel like I’m not just shouting into the void.

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  • Depression and anxiety,  Mental health,  Prose and poetry

    How I started my morning

    happy coffee
    Photo by Kaboompics .com on Pexels.com

    I was drinking coffee this morning

    watching the news

    when the anchor said an accident had occurred

    in the city where I worked.

    The streets were all

    too familiar.

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  • Prose and poetry


    emotions feelings emotion feeling
    Photo by Katii Bishop on Pexels.com

    On Facebook and Instagram, with a thousand followers, your carefully curated feed.

    Scenes of nature: mountains, and beaches with water as clear as can be.

    Beautifully plated food in a restaurant whose interior must have cost a small fortune.

    Fashionable OOTDs of you showing off your physical perfection in a flowing floral skirt.

    Photos of family and friends and your lover, all of whom seem as perfect as you, impeccably dressed, with Kodak smiles.

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  • Health,  Life updates

    I quit smoking last year, and I’m surprisingly happy about it

    I have been a smoker since 2009. The past 3 years, I smoked a pack or two a day. Smoking brought me relief from stress, it made me feel better after a big meal, and it was perfect with a cup of coffee. When I was unemployed, I smoked a couple of packs a day out of sheer boredom.

    There was also a social aspect: smokers tend to go on breaks together and chit-chat while puffing away.


    So what made me decide to quit in December 2017?

    My coworker got gifted a vape set by his friend, and I tried puffing on it just to see if it tasted good. I had tried vaping before, and I hated it because it made me cough.

    This time around, though, I liked it enough to buy my own mod, atomizer, and juices. I was excited at the prospect of a new hobby. I watched videos on how to wick properly, and went to several vape shops to taste new juices.

    vape, juice, ecig, ejuice