College life,  Family,  Positivity,  Relationships,  Ruminations

New Year’s Resolutions: A Check-Up

Last January, I wrote down all the things I hope to accomplish in 2010. Now, it’s June, and I wanted to see how well I’ve been holding up my New Year’s resolutions.

I will get over my broken heart.

Easier said than done; I never was one to easily let go of people, let alone my longest, most serious relationship to date. I can still remember the night I realized that I had fallen out of love.
It was a school night, a hot and sticky night. I was lying in bed when all of a sudden, my ex-boyfriend texted me. We got to talking, and halfway through our conversation I realized that I was bored. My heart wasn’t pounding hard, I wasn’t reminiscing of the good times we had—I was actually really, completely, totally bored with the conversation.
I had cried rivers of tears. My pillow had seen so many sleepless nights. The heartbreak felt like it would never end.
It was the most ecstatic feeling to know that I had overcome that.

I will study harder.

Aaaaah, every student’s New Year’s resolution! Unfortunately, one I could not keep.
In the last semester of my first year in college, I got the lowest grades I have ever received in my whole life.
The first thing I thought of was my family and their reactions. Despite being the black sheep from time to time, I love my family and hate to disappoint them. My poor academic performance will most certainly not be a cause for their celebration.
Breaking down in tears, I texted my best friend, asking him to call because I really needed to talk to someone. To add to my chagrin, my mom arrived while I was in the midst of my crying fit. She took one look at my tearstained face and tangled hair (on which I was pulling out of despair) and said, “Nakita mo na grades mo ‘no?”

I will be a better friend.

I’d like to say I have accomplished this, but my friends might think otherwise, so… Can anyone testify to this?

Lose weight.

Every single year, I say this.

It’s actually funny: this is a New Year’s resolution, right? It’s just ironic that I say this on a night when I can pig out on my grandmother’s delicious cooking (baked mussels, homemade corned beef, corndogs, lasagna…)
Needless to say, I have failed dismally. I hate this resolution!

Oh, well. Two out of four is pretty good—at least for me.

Ela is a twentysomething who is constantly getting stuck in self-destructive behavior and bouts of low self-esteem. She struggles with depression and writes to relieve herself of her feelings. Sometimes she even blogs about other things like makeup and positivity. One of her pieces was published in the Inquirer Young Blood in October 2017. She likes cats, dogs, and sometimes even people.


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