Happy Overrated Day!

Happy Overrated Day!

Dear Cunt,

I know you don’t want all the overrated, candles-on-cake crap, but I just got to let you (and the whole blogosphere, apparently) know how awesome my best friend is.

Three things about this photo:

  1. We’ve been friends for years, and you’re one of my closest friends, but we only have 17 photos together. I guess that’s what happens when two people are both not photogenic.
  2. Lol at Kirstie’s face.
  3. If you click on “See Friendship,” the accurate thing to be displayed would be our midnight YM conversations full of music, movies, jokes, and *~emotions~*

I find it awesome that when we talk (usually online), we can go on for hours and hours until the wee hours of the morning. Seriously, how many nights have we spent exchanging Youtube links of funny shit and songs we think the other will like?

Other things about you that I find awesome:

  • you look good in pretty much everything (don’t get all cocky with me, though)
  • you know the stuff I love
  • you’re the only person who can cheer me up even when I’m feeling like complete, total crap
  • you are my number one fan, lol (no one else compliments me on my writing as much as you do)
Probably the only decent picture we have together.

Your awesomeness is so immense that when you die, I’d lay a Sausage McMuffin with Egg on your grave and not feel bad about not eating it.


I want to thank you for never breaking my trust, for giving me yours, for putting up with all my crazy, for patiently enduring my clingy, needy moods and for reassuring me (albeit without eloquence) when I feel like shit. There are no words to describe how much all that means to me.

The world is a cesspool teeming with phonies and festering buttcracks who make me hate humankind. You, who are thankfully not one of them, restore my faith in friendship and the possibilities it opens up. Thank you for letting me know that sometimes, letting people in is worth it.

And even if you are a cunt who pokes fun at my Aimee Bender fangirl-isms and who still doesn’t love The Cure as much as I do, I promise to always listen to you, fully, without judgment, and without the annoying human habit of pretending to listen but only waiting until you finish so I can talk next.


Ending this letter now because I’m starting to get all mushy and I do enough of that when I text you.

Honestly not knowing what I would do without you,
The Sap

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