Yes, I needed that in all caps and with an exclamation point!
Past couple of weeks have been killing me. I have been frantically keeping up with my schoolwork,
nursing a broken heart, going out with friends… Those are my priorities as of the moment (in order, thankyouverymuch).
College is getting to me. I’m already a second year student but it’s still surprising to find out how stressful the workload can get.
I sleep badly on weekdays now. In school, I feel like in a constant state of panic, thinking, “Pag-uwi ko, I should do this paper first, then another, then study pa for the quiz.” Too much to do and too little time to do it, so I have to do it half-assedly.
My nerves are so worn that I even snapped at Gab while I was photocopying a fuckton of book sources.
About my *~broken heart~*, well, I’ll tell you about it in a few months, when I’ve moved on or had closure or when I’m really really drunk and logged on to my blog. It’s not interesting, it’s just really sad.
One more thing that has added to my stress is that I can’t donate blood.
The UST Behavioral Science Society sent a group message asking for donors to help out a five-year-old leukemic named Bea. I texted Bea’s mom and offered to donate. When I got to to UST Hospital Blood Bank, however, the doctor informed me that I couldn’t donate blood until November 2011 because I got my tongue pierced last year.
That really sucked because I wanted so badly to help out Bea. I felt helpless and stupid; I was crying because I couldn’t help out someone I didn’t even know. I swear to god, I get too emotional sometimes.
If anyone wants to donate blood to help out a little girl in need, please contact me. I can set you up to donate. Please.
Which reminds me, everything makes me cry nowadays. I don’t know, I guess it’s the stress and everything that’s piling up on me that makes me break down. Denyang made me cry, Paula made me cry, The Cranberries’ Linger made me cry, Full House and Meteor Garden made me cry. It doesn’t take much to set me off now—I’m a fucking faucet these days.
This Sunday, I was supposed to go to an epic Tumblr meet-up, White Day. But at 4:30AM the night before, with swollen eyes and an exhausted mind, I decided not to go. Sleep in. I badly craved time for myself. I wasn’t feeling up to socializing.
Instead, I spent the day with my family in Marikina. They don’t know how shitty I was feeling, but they made me feel loads better. My friends over there were great at making me feel good. It was a breath of fresh air, like everything slowed down, for a day, at least.
Back to the rat race, I’m still tired but trying. Only two weeks to go.