• Friends

    A friendship I wish I never made

    I have made a lot of mistakes in my 26 years of existence; thus, I have a lot of regrets. Poor choices in romantic relationships, self-destructive behavior, etc. But the one thing that sticks out for me is a friendship with a particular person.

    What I discovered during our friendship

    This person had deep-seated trust issues. They were possessive of me having other friends, to the point that even missing a bus ride home with them was a point of contention. I had to walk on eggshells around them because they were especially sensitive. I always had to be the bigger person—I justified it by saying that they were too young and less mature than I was.

    Gelo was always annoyed at my friendship with that person because he knows that they don’t treat me as well as I should be treated. He wondered why I bothered to keep up my friendship with that person for so long.

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  • Friends,  Positivity

    I almost flaked on plans to have a wonderful night out

    When I’m in a depressive slump, I tend to shut myself off from people. My psychiatrist told me that I should follow through with plans, regardless of how I feel on that day. He said that it would help me feel better.

    He understood that it takes more energy for a depressive person to do this, but he stressed the point that isolating myself and lying prone in bed is not helpful, and only serves to reinforce my loneliness.

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  • Friends,  Personal Favorites,  Positivity

    I found comfort in the chaos of Makati

    In a bustling city of concrete and glass, we converged as strangers. Different people, different stories.

    One thing united us, as we eventually discovered: we were all broken in some way. Our past relationships with friends, family, and romantic partners haunted us. Those ghosts followed us all the way to Ayala Avenue, where an office building stood dark and formidable.

    city,ayala,makati,skylines

    Within those four walls, I experienced a gamut of emotions. Joy. Stress. Motivation. Pride. Anger. Sadness. You saw it all, from me helplessly weeping on the sidewalk to me practically yelling in the streets in a fit of rage.

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  • Family,  Friends,  Places

    A quick trip to Quezon

    For weeks, I pestered my parents for us to take a trip. It doesn’t have to be far away! I just want to get away from the metro for a while!

    Finally, on a weekend near the end of November, they caved to my whining. We’d be going to Quezon for an overnight trip, and they encouraged me to bring Gelo so I’ll have company.

    beach, trees

    And so, with some alcohol in the bed of our pickup and way more food than is necessary for an overnight trip, we drove to Real, Quezon. Being the chronically sleepy bum that I am, I spent the whole drive fast asleep, curled up like a cat, while Gelo happily made conversation with my parents.

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  • Friends,  Personal Favorites,  Prose and poetry

    You, me, and the sea

    But time makes you bolder, even children get older. And I’m getting older, too.

    Landslide, Fleetwood Mac

    “I’m happy we’re doing this,” you said. “We haven’t really talked like this in a while, and I’ve been wanting to speak with you.”
    I perked up a little, trying to blink the drowsiness from my heavy eyes. I wanted to listen, to truly hear what you had to say. Then again, you never did have much trouble catching my attention.

    tent on beach
    Photo by Jamison McAndie on Unsplash
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  • Friends,  Mental health,  Self-care

    Opening up

    background image beautiful blur bright
    Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

    It has been a particularly rough couple of months. I’m dealing with a lot of personal problems, which leaves me too exhausted to even play with my cat. I’ve been feeling physically and emotionally drained.

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  • Friends,  Mental health,  Ruminations

    I will always believe in you even when no one else will, not even you

    He spots me smoking alone and staring off into space. Lost in my Spotify playlist, I don’t notice him approach until he taps me on the shoulder and asks, “Are you okay?”

    He didn’t need to wait for an answer. I couldn’t speak, anyway. I just collapsed into his embrace.

    gelo

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  • Friends

    Of course friendships end, “end” is right there in the word!

    Can I wallow in self-pity for a while? I need to get something off my chest.

    rocks

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  • Friends

    To K & P

    I’ve had a lot of friends in my life come and go. For some reason, you two stayed.

    You’ve seen me at my best – joyful, laughing, making goals and bursting with joie de vivre. Now you see me at my worst – utterly despondent, lifeless, despairing.

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  • Depression and anxiety,  Family,  Friends,  Relationships,  Self-care

    Apologies to different people

    Sorry…

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